The Roller Coaster Ride of PTSD

I have a new term for you. Veloxroltaphobia. It's the fear of roller coasters. The symptoms: dry mouth, racing heartbeat, stomach doing more loops than the ride itself.  Apparently, Legoland has teamed up with psychologist Susan Bartell to provide parents with "Roller Coaster Readiness Tips" for nervous, reluctant tikes who are scared of this particular amusement park ride.

When I saw this in an article in USA Today last week, it made me think about the enormous number of women who have survived sexual assault and rape and "white knuckle" it through life.

I was on a never-ending roller coaster for 20 years.  It went something like this....
1. See man who looks like attacker.
2. Hold breath.
3. Hyperventilate.
4. Have heart palpitations.
5. Experience panic attack.
6. Realize it wasn't assailant.
7. Recover.

I lived with PTSD and was on edge for so long it became part of my framework, intertwined with my DNA and destiny.  Months became years, years became decades.   I really thought I could overcome it with the passage of time.  The fact is I could not.  The other important truth:  the sooner PTSD is confronted, the EASIER it is to overcome it.....I surely wish now someone would have clued me in on that tidbit!

Two years ago, I finally had enough of the daring drops and corkscrew turns and sought counseling from Ellen Emerson, a licensed psychologist in Statesboro.  She used cognitive therapy to rewire my brain and allow me the freedom to LIVE AGAIN, uninhibited by fear.

Until we can be victorious over post traumatic stress and free ourselves of the helpless and hopeless feelings that come from constant flashbacks, continual startling, and hyper vigilance, we are going to be on what feels like a perpetual Six Flags Scream Machine forever.

If you have no belief you will ever be able to get off the roller coaster and live again, that is not true!  I got off.  You can too.

I am a Survivor

The lyrics of Destiny Child’s “I am a Survivor” often  wash over me.  How can they not?

I'm a survivor (What?)

 

I'm not goin' give up (What?)

I'm not goin' stop (What?)

I'm goin' work harder (What?)

Over the last month while traveling and speaking to groups throughout the state, I met many other survivors who have suffered the pain, agony and torment of physical, mental and emotional invasions. Oh, how their stories resonated in me.

One such woman who is making an Oprah-sized impact on our planet is Paige Slocumb of Macon, Ga.  I had the honor of meeting Paige in Milledgeville while we served as guest speakers this past weekend.  Paige is passionate about ONE THING.  She wants our world to be a safe place for women to live. Of course we join her in her journey, don't we?

Her story is powerful. 

On July 25, 2006, during the middle of the day, Paige’s older sister, Jenny Ewing, was riding her bike on the Silver Comet Trail in Atlanta. She had her cell phone with her and was also equipped with pepper spray. Someone came out of the woods, dragged her off of her bike into that darkness we survivors all know. Evidence proves Jenny made every effort to fight for her life, scratching and even biting her attacker.   Jenny, who was vigilant, safety conscious and intelligent, still fell victim as she was brutally assaulted and kicked to death. Sadly, her final conscious moments were that of being raped.

In the aftermath of this senseless tragedy, Paige created Safe Alone, Inc to teach women and girls how to fight back. Her mantra is “Fight Like a Girl” and she teaches us how to use the powerful parts of a female’s body to save us from a man’s assault.    Her message resounded in my soul as she states emphatically women SHOULD be safe alone.  We SHOULD NOT have to worry about being alone in a public place.

You see, I was alone in a public place and it happened to me too.

A major shout out to Paige Slocumb and her courage to help others. 

If you know a women’s group who would be interested in learning these life-saving tactics as Paige and I SPEAK OUT, contact me and we will be there.